What casual dating means
Casual dating means seeing people without the expectation of commitment. You enjoy each other’s company, go on dates and see where things go, but nobody is planning a future together yet. If you keep seeing one person this way, you’re in a casual relationship. When someone says they’re “looking for something casual”, that’s usually what they mean, whether they’re a guy or a girl; the only way to know for sure is to ask, because people use the phrase loosely.
It works when both people know what it is and are happy with it. In Pew Research Center’s 2022 survey, about 40% of recent online daters in the US said dating casually was a major reason they used dating sites or apps, almost as many as the 44% looking for a long-term partner (Pew Research Center, 2023). So on most mainstream apps, you’ll find plenty of people who want the same thing, as long as you say so.
Casual dating vs a relationship, a situationship and exclusive dating
- Casual dating vs a relationship: a relationship comes with commitment and shared plans; casual dating doesn’t, and either of you may see other people.
- Casual dating vs a situationship: both are uncommitted, but casual dating is agreed out loud. A situationship drifts along without anyone saying what it is.
- Casual vs exclusive dating: you can date casually and still agree to see only each other. That’s exclusive casual dating, and it’s worth saying out loud too.
- Casual vs intentional dating: intentional dating means looking for a long-term partner from the start. Our guide to dating vs a relationship explains where the lines usually fall.
How to show you want casual dating on an app
You don’t need a special casual dating site. The big apps let you state your intentions on your profile:
- Tinder has Relationship Goals, with six options, including “Short-term fun”, “Short-term, open to long” and “Still figuring it out” (Tinder, 2022). Your choice shows as a banner on your profile.
- Hinge has Dating Intentions, including short-term options and “Figuring out my dating goals”, and you can make them visible on your profile.
- Badoo, happn, Hily and Plenty of Fish rely more on your bio, so add a line such as “not looking for anything serious right now.”
Casual dating rules and etiquette
There’s no rulebook, but a few habits keep things fair. Say what you want early, on your profile or in the first few messages, not after the third date. Agree how often you’ll see or text each other rather than guessing. Be clear if you’re seeing other people, since many casual daters are. And check in now and then: a quick “are we still on the same page?” avoids hurt later. Red flags are the same as in any dating: pressure, secrecy, or someone who keeps changing what they say they want.
Casual dating in your 30s, 40s, 50s and after divorce
Casual dating isn’t only for people in their 20s. After a divorce or a long relationship, it can be a gentle way back into dating before you decide what you want next. Plenty of Fish and Facebook Dating have members of all ages and let you message for free, and Tinder’s Relationship Goals work at any age. Over 50, the pool on swipe apps gets smaller, so see our rankings of dating sites for over 50s and dating after divorce for sites with more people your age.
Free casual dating sites and apps
Every app in this ranking lets you match and chat for free. Tinder, Badoo and Plenty of Fish don’t charge to message, happn lets you chat once you’ve both liked each other, and Facebook Dating has no paid plans at all. Paid upgrades mainly add more likes, a view of who liked you and profile boosts. If you only want to try one, start with Tinder in a city and Plenty of Fish in a smaller town. Gay, lesbian and queer daters will find casual dating works the same way on LGBTQ+ apps; see our LGBTQ+ dating sites ranking. For more options, see our ranking of free dating sites.
Can casual dating turn into a relationship?
Yes, and it’s common enough that Tinder offers “Short-term, open to long” and Hinge has similar options. In the same Pew survey, 19% of recent online daters said both casual dating and finding a long-term partner were major reasons they used dating apps. If your feelings change, talk about it honestly rather than hoping the other person feels the same, and end things kindly if you want different things. If you realize you want more than casual, our ranking of dating sites for serious relationships is a better place to start.